Can’t keep going back
to what I used to know
Lord, please hold my hand
as I go down this road
The lyrics of Madison Ryann Ward’s “Familiar” replayed in my heart as a precursor to intentional stillness. Personally curated quiet spaces are where I commune with the Holy One of Heaven. Here is where I am free to be my vulnerable-honest-soft-surrendered-disappointed-angry self without worry of repercussion. Here, I pour it all out as whatever version of me exists at that time. My Father/Potter is safe. My Redeemer/Rabbi is safe. My Comforter/Teacher is safe.
What’s behind me will never be greater than what is ahead of me. The thought came, and then the Word came…
12 Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. 13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, 14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 3:12-14, NKJV)
The unfolding of a life surrendered to Christ is an experience of having and still receiving, being and still becoming. Paul did ALL THE THINGS: He was a pure-blooded Hebrew born into the tribe of Benjamin and circumcized at 8 days old. He studied and strictly obeyed Jewish laws and customs, first as a youth and then as a Pharisee. He mastered what we at Change Church call “Second Way” living. (Shout out to PD and my Change Global fam!) Practicing religion was muscle memory to Saul before he became Paul. Yet, there was another way. A greater way. The Third Way.
For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. We then, as workers together with Him, also plead with you not to receive the grace of God in vain. (2 Corinthians 5:21 - 6:1)
According to Romans 3:22, all who believe and receive Jesus as Lord are the righteousness of God…and there is still a becoming. A journey of learning how to be who we already are. I am still learning to become who I am.
Faith without works is dead. That’s a FACT. The challenge is not only discerning my desires from God’s will but also maintaining the right heart posture.
Am I relying on myself or God?
Am I pleasing Yahweh or people?
Am I being led by the Spirit or my intellect?
What I know about me is that chronic independence is always within earshot. It is always calling out, enticing me to return to the false sense of control that once held me captive.
Can’t keep going back
to what I used to know
Lord, please hold my hand
as I go down this road
Thankfully, Third Way righteousness values surrender over perfection. It is all faith and no facades. Third Way is being aware of who I presently am, knowing there is a higher, more refined version of me awaiting, and then not attempting to close the gap in my strength. There is grace (and peace) in knowing that both versions belong to Christ and are in Christ. He is the Author and Finisher of my faith; He who writes the story determines the pace.
As I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus, I am thankful that the press is a partnership between my surrender and the Holy Spirit’s leading.
Thank You, Lord, for always supplying strength for the journey.
Sincerely,
LaToya NaShae
Thank you for sharing LaToya…..your thoughts challenge and encourage me.
This was exactly what I needed to read today. It spoke directly to where I am right now.
I was so close to going back to what I used to know and leaning on my own understanding because it seemed to make more sense. But looking back, I can see I was slowly becoming self-led instead of Spirit-led. I don't want to live that way again.
My own way was filled with confusion, no real peace, and so much uncertainty. I could only see as far as my own eyes and understanding would allow me to see, and every time I tried to control everything myself, it eventually failed me.
So today, I choose to trust God's way over my own. I choose to follow the path He has already planned and predestined for my life instead of fighting against His will, His purpose, and His timing. I've experienced where my own path leads, and I don't want to go back there again.
Thank you so much, LaToya NaShae, for sharing. This is a timely reminder that what's ahead of me is far greater than anything I'm leaving behind.