GOOD IS THE ENEMY OF GREAT
Good to Great by Jim Collins
Eh, not always.
Good doesn’t deserve to be demonized. Sometimes “good” truly needs to level up. At other times, though, good is suitable. It is sufficient. It is water to a dry and weary soul.
Good is contentment that makes room for growth without grumbling about present gaps.
Good is in sync with the season, understanding the times like the sons of Issachar.
Good is intentionally engaging in rest, playfulness, gratitude, and contemplation.
I am embracing the truth of good being a designation that doesn’t necessarily denote a deficit.
GOOD IS A MARK OF DISTINCTION
The heart can know what the mind is slower to catch up to. Somewhere along the way, my heart stopped focusing on good vs. best and shifted to good and core.
I don’t have a best friend - haven’t had one in years, actually. That’s no shade to those who use the term or to those who consider me their bestie.
“Best friend” isn’t a title that I shake off. It’s simply not my label of choice because my good friendships aren’t inferior relationships.
Friendship is for enjoyment, development,
and achievement
Relational Intelligence by Dr. Dharius Daniels
2023 shaped my life in ways that continue to be revealed. It kicked off with God telling me that He wanted me to be softer and that soft was safe. (We’ll get to that one of these days.) I stepped away from a church that I helped launch, started therapy, jumped into HR, released my first album of journal entries set to jazzy tunes, and experienced my view of friendship being reshaped while reading my pastor’s book, Relational Intelligence.
We have an absolute ball with good friends!
We grow with good friends because accountability looks like iron sharpening iron.
We win with good friends because every joint is committed to supplying curious questions, confirmation, creativity, and challenges.
We laugh, mature, and excel with good friends, but I now have the language to articulate the heart distinction that my mind was slow to realize: Some good friends double as core friends, but not every good friend is a core friend.
Full Body Sculpt w/ Kristina Girod
If you’ve ever worked out with a trainer, whether in-person or online, you’ve heard them shout, “Engage your core!” Glute bridges, Russian twists, dumbbell snatches, planks - so on and so forth - are only as beneficial as the engagement of our core. An engaged core produces good form, and good form yields optimal results.
Good friends pray Psalm 91 over us; core friends war in the spirit with us.
Good friends carry our prayer requests to the throne of God; core friends seek the Lord about how to intercede on our behalf.
Good friends are present to witness the miraculous unfold in our lives; core friends witness our weaknesses during Gethsemane-like moments.
Good friends are the nine; core friends are the other three.
To be clear, good friends and core friends are God-ordained. Both have their place and purposefully add value to our lives, just in different ways. Core friends, however, are more intimate connections, meaning they are permitted to see into us to a greater degree.
Engaging core friends requires discernment, wisdom, and vulnerability. We must allow the Holy Spirit to reveal who they are, instruct us in honoring the rarity of the relationship, and help us to bravely show up with our masks off, willingly revealing who we really are, not just showing some sanitized version of ourselves.
Fully engaging core friendships requires a blend of honesty, empathy, and humility that first demands self-awareness. If we desire core friendships and aspire to be a core friend, we must ask ourselves:
Am I emotionally mature enough to express my relational expectations, admit when my feelings have been hurt, and respectfully disagree instead of going along to get along?
Am I able and willing to hold my core friends’ emotions as they do for me?
Am I capable of confessing my faults and remaining open to wise counsel?
Similar to core workouts, engaging core friendships brings balance, stability, and ease to our lives.
Balance | He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed. (Proverbs 13:20)
Stability | For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up. (Ecclesiastes 4:10)
Ease | Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. (Ecclesiastes 4:9)
May we all follow the Spirit’s leading as we learn to fully engage our core.
Sincerely,
LaToya NaShae